Never Good Enough

a poem

I want them all

Every great story, every fairytale all mine

I don’t want a best possible future

I want the best of all

the one without the regrets of the past the lost chances, the goodbyes

the one they promised me I’ll have

if I listened to my heart and tried my best

Since when bruises on the field became part of the game and not the victory, the legacy ?

Oh how can I ever be enough water

when there’s always an ocean

I tried to make my lake a sea

I swear I tried

Human heart was the only boundary I let myself have

Should I have crossed that too?

I whisper this question in my sleep I scream this question in the late evening

Is the impossibility of answering that question a confirmation of my fears

Oh in another life I didn’t have a heart

Will I still not be enough?